As I have mentioned in previous posts, this process of conversion can be gut-wrenchingly difficult. Knowing Jesus more and more brings with it an increased longing for more of Him. It’s Divine Dissatisfaction. I have found that I am OK through most of the Mass, but get to Communion and I turn into a puddly mess. And my soul cries out.
I shared this with my priest and he comforted me with this thought: Continue reading
I’ve been reading a book, Hail, Holy Queen, The Mother of God In The Word of God, by Scott Hahn. I won’t lie. It’s been hard, this seeking to understand Mary and her roles as Mother of God, Queen of Heaven, and Mother to us all. Continue reading
I am not worthy that You come under my roof. Only say the word and my soul will be healed.
Today in Mass, I knelt there watching and listening to the priest say the words of consecration. And my heart started to break. We went forward for Communion, not receiving, as usual. I bowed before the Eucharist and Father Philip blessed me. And I wept. I wept, I wept. I went back to our seats, knelt and wept some more. Continue reading
My heart feels heavy for the condition of the church. Oh, Luther! Calvin! Zwingli! Let’s go back and start over!!!! Because this is getting ridiculous. It’s passed hurtful, looking at comical in the rear-view mirror and now is downright confounding. Continue reading
Here’s the first video that broke my heart: Continue reading
A week or so ago I found myself sort of….well discouraged with my journey. I felt like I was in no-man’s land. I asked St. Therese to pray for me and if possible to send me a sign.
On Sunday we went to St. Therese church, as has been our habit. And the kisses from Jesus started coming. First we sat behind a whole row of Missionaries of Charity in the blue and white saris. They were so joyful and lovely I wanted to exchange a sign of peace with all of them. And resisted the urge to invite myself over after church. They were radiant. (They are like the rock stars of religious life for me.)
The homily was powerful, powerful, powerful and left me in tears. Continue reading
I have been a worship leader and a pastor. In Protestant non-liturgical churches there is often a disconnect between worship leaders and pastors.
Generally speaking worship leaders see the most important part of the Sunday service as the “worship”–meaning the singing and the pouring of one’s heart out to God. The music, no-doubt, takes up the bulk of the service, say 45 minutes or even more. A service in which the Holy Spirit really moves, the sermon may be skipped altogether as we spend the whole time in worship.
Pastors, on the other hand, generally see the preaching of the Word as the most important part of the service. When the Word is preached and people receive revelation for their lives….that’s the good stuff. The “worship” (meaning, again, the singing) serves to prepare people to receive the message. Continue reading
“So far as a man may be proud of a religion rooted in humility, I am very proud of my religion; I am especially proud of those parts of it that are most commonly called superstition. Continue reading
Even as I was starting to appreciate ancient Catholic doctrines, there remained this thing about Baptism. I believed strongly Anabaptist theology (Believer’s Baptism), that one must be old enough and aware enough to know what they are doing. They must be believers themselves, desire the experience, and request the experience. In addition, Baptism was something that we did as a sign of what had already happened inside. There was nothing about the water that saved us. It was simply an act of obedience, symbolic only.
I’ve heard other arguments for infant baptism and for Baptism being a sacrament. But, never got on board.
Then I read this from St. Hildegard and in an instant, my theology shifted: Continue reading
How often have I heard the following: Christianity isn’t a religion, it’s a relationship.
It has several variations. But the gist is the same. Religion = bad. And everything gets lumped in there. If it is liturgical, ritual, sacramental, well…..that’s just legalistic, man-made and…religious. Continue reading
